Why Are You So Defensive?

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you acted in a way that seemed out of character? Maybe you avoided confronting a problem or reacted in anger when you felt hurt.

These are all examples of psychological defence mechanisms at work—the shields we unconsciously use to protect ourselves from uncomfortable feelings, thoughts, or situations.

So, why do we do this? Why do our minds employ such complex mechanisms to shield us from reality?

Well, it all comes down to survival, both physical and emotional.

Evolutionarily, our brains are wired to keep us safe and ensure our well-being. However, not only external threats trigger these defences; internal conflicts and distressing emotions can also prompt their activation.

So, let's delve into some of the most common psychological shields and explore how we use them in our lives:

1. Compensation

Imagine someone who feels insecure about their intelligence.

To compensate for this perceived deficiency, they may excel in other areas, such as sports or art, seeking validation and self-worth through these achievements.

2. Denial

When faced with a distressing reality, individuals may refuse to acknowledge it, preferring to maintain a false sense of security.

For example, someone diagnosed with a terminal illness might deny the severity of their condition, believing that it will somehow resolve on its own.

3. Displacement

Have you ever been angry with your boss but found yourself snapping at your partner instead? That's displacement in action.

This defence mechanism redirects emotions from their source to a safer target.

4. Identification

We often identify with people or groups with qualities or traits we admire or aspire to have.

For instance, teenagers may idolise celebrities and adopt their fashion sense, speech patterns, or lifestyle choices to feel connected or validated.

5. Introjection

It occurs when individuals internalise external beliefs, values, or attitudes without critically evaluating them.

For example, a person raised in a religious household may adopt their family's faith without questioning its tenets or implications.

6. Projection

Ever notice how people attribute their unacceptable thoughts, feelings, or traits to others? That's a projection.

For instance, someone who harbours feelings of jealousy may accuse their partner of being unfaithful, projecting their insecurities onto them.

7. Reaction Formation

This defence mechanism involves expressing the opposite of one's true feelings or desires.

For example, someone who harbours unconscious feelings of attraction toward the same gender might exhibit exaggerated hostility toward LGBTQ+ individuals as a way to conceal their own identity.

8. Rationalisation

When faced with uncomfortable or irrational thoughts or actions, individuals may create logical explanations or justifications to make them more acceptable.

For instance, someone who fails an exam might rationalise their poor performance by blaming it on external factors such as the test being unfair or the teacher being biased.

9. Regression

In times of stress or anxiety, individuals may revert to earlier stages of development or behaviour patterns.

For example, an adult experiencing significant life changes or trauma might start exhibiting childlike behaviours, such as seeking comfort from a parent or engaging in thumb-sucking.

10. Repression

This defence mechanism pushes distressing thoughts, memories, or emotions into the unconscious mind, which remains out of awareness.

For example, someone who experiences trauma may repress the memories associated with it as a way to cope with the overwhelming emotions.

11. Ritual & Undoing

Rituals and undoing involve engaging in repetitive behaviours or actions to alleviate guilt or anxiety.

For instance, someone plagued by intrusive thoughts about harming others might engage in compulsive rituals such as counting or handwashing to neutralise their distress.

12. Sublimation

Instead of directly expressing unacceptable impulses or desires, individuals channel them into socially acceptable outlets.

For example, someone with aggressive tendencies might channel their energy into competitive sports or artistic pursuits, allowing them to express themselves constructively.

Defence mechanisms are not inherently good or bad; they serve as adaptive strategies to help us cope with life's challenges.

However, using excessively or rigidly these defence mechanisms can stifle personal growth and prevent us from healthily confronting reality.

Our psychological shields are like invisible armour, protecting us from the blows of life's uncertainties and discomforts.

By understanding these defence mechanisms and their underlying motivations, we can gain insight into our behaviours and develop healthier coping methods for stress and adversity.

Until next time, try to be a little less defensive.

Dion Le Roux

References

1. Freud, S. (1963). The ego and the mechanisms of defence. International Universities Press.

2. Vaillant, G. E. (1992). Ego mechanisms of defence: A guide for clinicians and researchers. American Psychiatric Pub.